Pierre and
Boudreaux was flying Cajun Airlines to da Mardi Gras. Boudreau
was flying da plane and Pierre was in da back foolin wit da
cargo equipment an stuff. Da plane hit some turbulence an
started bouncin around an Boudreaux got knock unconscious. Den
da plane start driftin.
Pierre come run up to da front an Boudreaux was sprawl out
over da steerin wheel. Well, Pierre don't know nutin bout
flyin an he start to get panaky. He grab da microphone and
holla "May Day! May Day! Dis is Cajun Air Line 90210.
Boudreaux, him knock unconscious an I don know nutin about
flyin dis plane!"
"Dis is da control tower," someone answer. "Don you worry
about nutin. We gonna splain how you to land dis plane, step
by step, ah gar-own-tee! Jus leave anyting ta us. Fus, how
high you are an whas you position?"
Pierre thought a minute, den say, "I'm five foot ten an I'm
all da way to da front of da plane."
"No! No!" answer da tower. "What you altitude an where you
location?"
Pierre say, "Man ah got a po attitude, an I'm from
Thibodeaux!"
"No! No! No!" came an exasperated voice. "Ah needs to know how
many feet you got off da groun an how you plane in relation to
da airport!" Pierre he start to panic by dis time. He say, "Countin
Boudreaux's an mine, we got four feet off da groun an I don
believe dis plane related to you airport!"
A long pause---de silence was deafenin. "We needs to know who
you next of kin..."
Bonus Coonass Joke
Assertiveness Training
The first speaker, a lady from England stood up and said,
"During last years' conference we spoke about being more
assertive with our husbands. Well, after the conference I went
home and told my husband, Barrington, that I would no longer
cook for him and that he would have to do it himself!
After the first day, I saw nothing. After the second day, I
saw nothing. But on the third day, I saw that he had cooked a
wonderful roast lamb." The crowd cheered.
The second speaker, a lady from Russia stood up and said,
"After last years' conference I went home and told my husband,
Ivan, that I would no longer do his laundry and that he would
have to do it himself.
After the first day, I saw nothing. After the second day, I
saw nothing. But on the third day, I saw that he had done not
only his own washing, but my washing as well." The crowd again
cheered.
The third speaker, a Cajun lady from Thibodaux, Louisiana,
stood up and said, "Afta last years' conference, I went rat
home and tole dat lazy Coonass husband'a mine, Boudreaux, dat
I wadn't gonna do no mo'a his cookin', cleanin' or shoppin'
and dat he wuz gonna have to do it all fer hissef." The crowd
got to their feet and roared approval. When it became quiet,
she continued, "And I tole'em I wadn't gonna be doin' no mo
cleanin' 'em nasty crawfeesh, giggin' no mo boolfrogs and
water dawgs, skinnin' none'a dem musrats and nutrias or
check'n no mo catfeesh trotlines." The crowd went wild - the
cheering and clapping lasted for at least five minutes. When
it again became calm, she continued,
